1 Samuel 15:35–16:13
“You have mourned long enough for Saul. I have rejected him as king of Israel, . . . Find a man named Jesse who lives there, for I have selected one of his sons to be My king” (1 Samuel 16:1).


Read Genesis 13:6-18 and consider how Abraham’s decision to separate from Lot revealed the inner motivations of each man and opened the door for God’s blessing in Abraham’s life.


What are the biblical markers to indicate when a relationship is no longer healthy? How must our response to the marriage covenant be different from our response to other relationships in our lives?

I spent the summer of 1992 tumbling, somersaulting, and plowing over the waters of Strom Thurmond Lake in South Carolina. Belying any grand designs, I was simply trying to learn how to water-ski. A painful endeavor, it revealed the deep level of determination I carry within me. One of my greatest errors lay in my refusal to let go of the rope and admit defeat when I had fallen. It was not a pretty sight.

Twenty years later, far from the roar of the boat’s motor and the cool water of a hot summer day, I find myself tumbling, somersaulting, and plowing through the waters of a particular relationship to find reconciliation. Like Samuel, I have mourned over what could have been (1 Samuel 15:35). Believing the call of God was on this individual’s life to lead others into His truth, I am left confused and grieved over the events that have transpired. I’ve tried through my own determination to understand, but instead hit the water with a fierce smack. The message is clear: Let go.

Samuel could have continued to insist that he was bound to see Saul get it right, but God had appointed otherwise (1 Samuel 16:1). The option was no longer whether Saul would obey what God had commanded, but whether Samuel would heed the voice of God in releasing Saul.

In Romans 12:18, Paul writes, “Do all that you can to live in peace with everyone.” Because Jesus has set within us the message of reconciliation (2 Corinthians 5:19), we’re to do all we can to keep our relationships in right accord with the Word. There are also occasions, however, when the right choice is separation—but only through biblical means and measures.

NLT 365-day reading plan passage for today: Exodus 1:8–2:10

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10 Responses to “let go”

  1. jaik says:

    Thank you for today’s message. My brother hit me and verbally abused me in April 2012. I got a protection order against him. He is a very violent person. My late mum, brother and myself used to live together. He always threatened to hit and kill my mum and me but we always protected each other and this time my mum was not there to protect me. My mum left the house to me in her will. My brother is now taking me to court as he says that he has the right to that house as well. He refuses to accept the will and is contesting it. He is also lying that he did not hit me. Please can you pray for me my trial starts tomorrow. Living with my brother is unbearable. I pray that the judge will not allow him back into the house.

    • Dear Jaik,

      I am praying for you. May you be fearless in knowing that the Lord is your protection and provision (Psalms 91). May God restore, not only your sense of dignity because He has created you, but also your sense of safety and well-being.

  2. tom felten says:

    Good perspective, Regina. By God’s instruction and the empowering of the Holy Spirit we must strive to see peace fill all our relationships. But if the other person isn’t willing to seek peace (is argumentative, violent, etc.), we also have Scriptural guidelines for how to handle those situations too. May God give us wisdom and discernment as we strive to be a people of peace representing the Prince of Peace!

  3. nattykins says:

    Thank you so much for this message. It truly hit me in my heart this morning. I’ve been with my boyfriend 2 years this month. He’s not saved and grew up in a catholic home. He believes in God, but doesn’t live a godly lifestyle. I’ve tried to witness to him and he’s even gone to church with me about a dozen times; but I feel right now, we are not equally yoked. So last night, I told him we need a trial seperation so I can pray and listen to God on my own and figure out if this man is truly the one for me without doubts…So the whole seperation part of your devotional really spoke to me. Sorry for the rambling, but please keep me in prayer and for jaik, I will definitely keep you in my prayers that the Lord will see you through this difficult time, and that the judge will grant the case in your favor. God Bless!!

  4. pjack4 says:

    Thank you for this today.
    I am recently divorced. for years my husband has cheated on me and I chose to forgive and start over. But this last time he decided to leave me and divorce me. I truly was devastated and wondered why all this happened to me. I always thought he would turn his life to God and see what kind of woman I was to him and live for God. Lately I have been asking God why he could not see what we had and our children. But today I know God has answered this in your devotion. I must let go, Biblically we could be divorced due to his adultery. So I know now I don’t have to feel ashamed.

    Thank you

  5. mlsswvr47 says:

    Great insight!! I’ve had to “let go” of several people in my life due to their malicious behaviours. Thanks again!!

  6. Terrence Simon says:

    Great thought!!

    I also felt the same why all this things happen to me. Why God allows all troubles and failures in my life. Even I tired my best to stay in Godly way but often missed out. Now struggling with lot problem but having faith in my lord.

    let go with all troubles and trails. “Season Will Change”

    Praying for jaik and nattykins

  7. daisymarygoldr says:

    Praying for jaik, nattykins, pjack4 and Terrence Simon…

    Good post, Regina! As you rightly pointed out, the inner motivation is the basis for separation. Lot was worldly and Abraham had his eyes on things above. There is always a conflict between the earthly and the heavenly. There can be no peace between light and dark, natural and spiritual, godly and ungodly. These are the precursors for relationships to become unhealthy. In marriage, only if the unbelieving spouse insists on leaving, then let them go.

    Throughout the Bible, God separates to Himself a person or people for a specific purpose. He called out Abraham to be separated from his country, people, and father’s household—which also included Lot. Abraham’s obedience caused blessings to flow not just in his life but all people on earth are blessed through him. And for us as followers of Christ, separation is the cost of our discipleship (Luke 14:26). We must let go of anyone or anything that hinders the work which God does in and through our lives.

    Samuel had no option but obey— and let go of Saul who was the past, as it affected his priestly duties in the present to prepare David for the future. It is okay to grieve for disappointments due to crushed expectations, sins and failures of the past. But to spend our whole lives in mourning, will not only affect one’s ministry in the present. It will also prevent the person from moving forward into the blessed anointing in the future.

    Separation is sad but ultimately it is for the best of both parties involved. A healthy parting bears no bitterness. Samuel’s sorrow reflected his love for Saul. And even though Abraham chose to part ways with Lot, he risked his life to rescue Lot and also interceded for God to save sinful Sodom—for the sake of his brother’s son. Goodbye does not block the blessings of brotherly love.

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